THIS IS NOT A GUILT TRIP .... I may regret posting this out there soon after I hit enter, about making myself vunerable before the world. I might even delete it later. But I am feeling kind of weary here, please lift me up in prayer .... We started this ministry (Rivers of Living Water ~ Helping Orphans and Widows in Need) with the annointing of the Lord. It was His idea, not ours. People have

come out of the woodwork and thanked ME for the honor of allowing them to sponsor a child, to make a difference (even in the midst of the economic crisis). But every quarter when the next donation is due ... ugh. God help me. I hate this part of my job: collecting the donations. One by one, some have had to stop. It happens, no shame, no condemnation ... financial hardships here and there, but then there are those who say they will sponsor then never follow thru ... another unfriended me, then just quit supporting her child. How very sad. She is not rejecting me, but she has rejected her child. But the thing is ... we have already started supporting them. They have tasted the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. There is NO WAY I am going to start cancelling kids from this program!! If anything, there are HUNDREDS more that need a sponsor. But my family cannot support them all. We need help. We need more of Jesus. We need the body of Christ ... This is not a guilt trip. This is me asking for you to PRAY for these children, for this Orphan Ministry, for me who carry these kids in my heart. We may not be the most popular, the coolest, or have the latest T-shirt and merchandise in our store. But WE LOVE OUR KIDS. They have no hope. WE ARE THEIR HOPE. Right now we have over 100 kids waiting in the wings who need a first time sponsor. But I can't add them because, we have 4-5 existing kids who need NEW sponsors and the enemy is taking them out one by one. Please pray with me that the Lord would once again find sponsors for these kids, so they can continue to receive a chance at a new life. Pray for our ministry that the Lord would add finances, an over abundance so that we can continue to be the hands and feet of Jesus. Pray that the Lord would lift this burden off of me, that HE WOULD FIGHT for them. Thank you so much. ♥

Waiting Period

Our family is in a Waiting Period, a Time of Preparation. It almost looks like nothing is happening, like we are treading water. We are not fundraising, not packing, not doing anything tangible, really. The Lord has said "Get Ready" but also "Wait". He is sifting us, cleaning us up, stripping us, healing us, ... it is a season of attack and pain and healing and comfort all at the same time. It is painful, but thank you Lord, I see the light at the end of the tunnel. I see the goal, the prize. Please pray for us as we walk thru this season ... I can say this: He is close to the broken hearted and I know He will never leave us. He has a plan and He is doing something deep and under the surface to get us ready. Something we can't explain. Thanks for your prayers. ♥

GO MAKE DISCIPLES . . .

Have you seen this? There is a movement of God ... He is calling individuals .. youth, adults, FAMILIES, to GO. To leave your comfort zone, give up the American Dream and invest in the kingdom and MAKE DISCIPLES OF ALL NATIONS ... Count. Me. In.

I want to be poured out like a drink offering over the nation to which He has chosen for us. But, what about America you say? Is He sending you to America? Then GO MAKE DISCIPLES in America. Is He calling you to AFRICA? Then GO MAKE DISCIPLES in Africa. That was His Great Commision. GO .... and the Good News is ... He will be with you!! Praise God.

Jesus came and told his disciples, “I have been given all authority in heaven and on earth. Therefore, GO and make disciples of all the nations, (WHICH NATIONS? ALL) baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” ~ Matthew 28:18-20

At All Times . . .

I will praise the Lord at all times.
I will constantly speak his praises.
I will boast only in the Lord;
let all who are helpless take heart.
Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness;

let us exalt his name together.
I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me.
He freed me from all my fears.
Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy;
no shadow of shame will darken their faces.
In my desperation I prayed, and the Lord listened;
he saved me from all my troubles.
For the angel of the Lord is a guard;
he surrounds and defends all who fear him.
Taste and see that the Lord is good.
Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in him!

~ Psalm 34:1-8

Do You Not Know?

Do you not know? Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;

... but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint. ~ Isaiah 40:28-31

Leave Your Country . . .

“The Lord had said to Abram,‘Leave your country, your people and your father’s household and go to the land I will show you. I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you; I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you, and whoever curses you I will curse; and all peoples on earth will be blessed through you.’ So Abram left, as the Lord had told him; and Lot went with him. Abram was seventy-five years old when he set out from Haran.”

"Notice Abram’s response to God’s revelation. Abram simply left and did what the Lord revealed to him. A good question to consider is,“If God revealed a new thing to us in relationship to what He wants to accomplish in and through us, how long would it take us to get in a position to respond?” Spiritual preparedness is about positioning ourselves or assuming a posture that frees us to respond to God’s activity around us."

Strong and Courageous . . .

This is my command: Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. ~ Joshua 1:9, NLT

By Faith . . .

"By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to a place that he was to receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going. By faith he went to live in the land of promise, as in a foreign land, living in tents with Isaac and Jacob, heirs with him of the same promise. For he was looking forward to the city that has foundations, whose designer and builder is God." ~ Hebrews 11:8-10

Be Still . . .

Do you wrestle with fear? 

The internet went down at our house this morning at maybe 11:00. So I picked up the phone to call Qwest. Dial tone, but can't dial out ... OK. So I get my cell phone ... dials but then drops the call. ... Hmmm. We are not in Ethiopia. We are in Montana. What's up with this? Amazing how your mind starts flying at all the possibilites ... like did we just go thru an...other 9-11 or something? Did the US just get attacked? The phones are not connected to the cell phone system, what's next.. the electricity? I went to town to check it out, all phones & computers down, cell phones down, the bank, the doctor's office, everyone down. 4 Qwest trucks at the Qwest office ... empty with the windows down. Did they all go to lunch ... on foot? So I left one a note on the seat of the truck, in case they didn't have a clue as to what was happening. Went back home.

Phones came up at around 6:00pm tonight, internet around 7:00. VERY WEIRD FEELING. It really gave me a chance to see what was in me. Amazing how much we depend on our technology in America, almost like a sense of security. The Amish are free ... watching the animals going on about their business, not worrying, the little birds unaffected by no phone lines .... Wishing I could have as much peace as they do, and truly believe with every part of my being that there is nothing to fear, because I am covered underneath Jesus' wings, hidden under his hand. I know this ... but when faced with fear, I forget. As I was writing this He reminded me of this scripture about the mountains giving way and falling in to the sea ...

Psalm 46
1 God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
3 though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging.
4 There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy place where the Most High dwells.
5 God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at break of day.
6 Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall;
he lifts his voice, the earth melts.
7 The Lord Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.
8 Come and see what the Lord has done,
the desolations he has brought on the earth.
9 He makes wars cease
to the ends of the earth.
He breaks the bow and shatters the spear;
he burns the shields with fire.
10 He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”
11 The Lord Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”

Then it FLEW OUT AT ME ... BE STILL and KNOW that I AM GOD.

He's been talking to me about being still .... Wow.
I love you Lord.

Incredible News !

On March 13th, we got a phone call from our adoption agency telling us that our littlest boy, had tested positive with HIV. They asked us if we wanted to proceed with the adoption. Without hesitation, we said yes. We got off the phone and began a new journey chosen for us by the Lord ... and we prayed ... we prayed that God would heal our son.

We read everything we could get our hands on, even started a new FB group called "Christian HIV Adopted Families", and received as much information as we could. (if you would like to join this group you can message me.) We learned that HIV is nothing to be afraid of. We learned that HIV is not AIDS. We learned that HIV is not contagious in a normal family setting. We learned that HIV is totally controlable with medicines called ARV's and that with consistant medication the HIV virus can reach undetectible levels in the blood and the person can go on and lead a normal healthy life, including birthing healthy children without HIV. We also learned that many people are still VERY AFRAID of HIV and that the stigma and fear runs deep. We prayed about whether we would fully disclose his medical condition due to this fear. We are a very open and honest family, but we felt trapped in society's stigma.

Two days ago, we recieved the blood tests for our 2 sons. But Robe's test sheets had a discrepancy. One sheet said HIV positive. One said HIV negative. Our agency director was traveling to Ethiopia and I just could not wait. I contacted the lab via email last night and asked them what this discrepancy meant. Today I got the answer. The first sheet was the first test, sent electronically. It did say HIV positive, but that they were waiting confirmation on the results. The second sheet was the confirmation that he was NEGATIVE. Then today he also sent me a third test of HIV DNA and the results were NEGATIVE!!!!!

Woo-Hoo!!!! Our God is GOOD!!! Whether there was a mistake or that God healed him, I do not care! I will STILL give him ALL THE PRAISE!!!!

Would I now be willing to adopt a child with HIV? YES.